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English

wit

Tagalog

talas ng isip

Last Update: 2016-10-07
Subject: General
Usage Frequency: 1
Quality:

Reference: Anonymous

English

[narrator] Once upon the last day of a golden summer, there was a boy... and bear. The boy, whom we shall meet in a moment, was called Christopher Robin. The bear was called Winnie the Pooh. And together they had many grand adventures in a remarkable place called the Hundred Acre Wood. But the grandest and most extraordinary of all their adventures was still to begin. T oday, I believe, is a good day for being Pooh. [hums] And here, I should say, is a good place for being Pooh. [hums] Any reason that I think of is a good one for being Pooh. [hums] [Iaughs] But the very best reason of all is... [boy] Pooh Bear. ...being with my very best friend, Christopher Robin. You are just in time for the best part of the day. What part is that? The part when you and me... ...become we. [clattering] Pooh,... there's something I have to tell you. Is it something nice? Not exactly. Then it can wait. It can? For how Iong? For ever and ever. # For ever and ever # Is a very long time, Pooh [chuckles] # Forever isn't long at all # When I'm with you [laughs] # I wanna call your name forever # And you will always answer forever # And both of us will be Forever you and me # For ever and ever [creaking, pop] # I wanna stay like this forever [Pooh Iaughs] # If only I could promise forever [Iaughing echoes] # Then we could just be we # Forever you and me [both] # For ever and ever # For ever and ever # Is a very long time, Pooh [Pooh chuckles] # Forever isn't long at all, Christopher # When I'm with you [Pooh chuckles] # I wanna be with you forever [echoes] # I want you right here beside me forever # One thing you should know # No matter where I go # We'll always be together # For ever and ever # [narrator] And so they stayed together, doing all the things a boy and a bear could do. And when the day began to end, Christopher Robin had quite forgotten he still had something to tell Pooh. [Christopher] Pooh Bear, there's one thing we didn't do today. [Pooh] And what thing might that be? [Christopher] Uh... nothing. Nothing? Christopher Robin, what exactly is "doing nothing"? Well, I'm told it means going along, Iistening to all of the things you can't hear, and not bothering. It's when people say "What are you two doing?" And we say "Oh, nothing." And we do it. This is sort of a nothing thing we're doing right now. I wish it could Iast forever. Well, then we must do it again tomorrow. And the tomorrow after. And the tomorrow following that. Pooh Bear,... what if... some day... there came a tomorrow when we were apart? As Iong as we're apart together we shall certainly be fine. [chuckles] Yes, yes, of course. But if we weren't together? If I were somewhere else? [chuckles] But you really couldn't be, as I would be quite Iost without you. Who would I call... [buzzing] ...on those days when I'm just not strong enough, or brave enough? Well, actually... And who would I ask for advice when I didn't know which way to turn? Pooh, we... We... We simply wouldn't be. [yawns] Oh, Pooh. If ever there's a tomorrow when we're not together, there's something you must remember. [yawns] And what might that be, Christopher Robin? You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. [chuckles] Oh, that's easy. [clears throat] We are braver than a bee, and, uh, Ionger than a tree, and taller than a goose. Or was that a moose? [both chuckle] No, silly old bear. You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem... and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is... even if we're apart... I'II always be with you. [Pooh chuckles] I'II always be with you. [echoing] AIways be with you. [Pooh moans] [birds twitter] [mutters] [snores] Braver than our beans. [snores] Longer when we gleam. [snores] Hum dee duh de dum. Hm dee duh-duh dee. [mutters] [Iaughs] Hello, Christopher Robin. I can't seem to remember the... To remember the, uh,... It's autumn. It is. It's the first day of autumn. A time of hot-chocolaty mornings and toasty-marshmallow evenings. And best of all.... Ieaping into Ieaves. Oh... [chuckles] Oh, someone's Ieft a honey pot. AII alone and Ionely. [groans] With no one to care for it. I suppose... I should take it. AIthough it might belong to someone. Though, just as easily not. Hmm. Think, think. Think. I believe when a question becomes this sticky, I should ask my very good friend... Christopher Robin. [echoing] Christopher Robin. Are you here? Are you there? Are you... anywhere? [Pooh] Piglet! Piglet! Christopher Robin is gone. Christopher... Chri... Why, Piglet, whatever are you doing... up there? I'm doing just what Christopher Robin said I should do. I'm going to Iook my fear of heights right in the face and conquer it. [creaking] That is, if it doesn't conquer me first. Christopher Robin! Are you Iooking for him, too? [Tigger purrs] Hiya, Pooh! [chuckles] - What's up? - Hello, Tigger. Piglet... is up. Help! Oh, relax, Piglet, old pal. There's no difference between plunging 1 0,000 feet to the jagged rocks below and tumblin' out of bed. Oh, really? Why, sure! [Iaughs] Except for the splat at the end they're practic'Iy similar. Christopher Robin! Hmm. CIutched in the throes of terror, eh? Well, I guess I just better bounce up there and get him down. Stand back, this is gonna take a world's record bounce. What's the matter with you? Being a second-rate bouncer is not what tiggers Iike best. [rumbling] [creaking] [creaking] [strains] [strains] [shrieks] It doesn't matter if you think you're not ripe. This is Rabbit's garden, and Rabbit does his harvesting by the book. As it clearly says in the official almanac, "Today is... [clears throat] the first day of fall following the Iast day of summer." Harvest day. Any questions? [Pooh] Hello. Oh, yes, the rutabaga in the back row, "Hello" what? [rumbling] [shrieks] [Pooh] Hello, Rabbit. Not much of a house. Just right for not much of a donkey. [Rabbit gibbers] [shrieks] Easy come,... easy go. Excuse me, Rabbit,... but would you happen to have a... a, um,... Christopher Robin about you? No! I haven't seen him. - Bother. - [thud] - He isn't where he should be. - [thud] - And wasn't where we were. - [thud] - And seems not to be anywhere... - [thud] ...where he can tell me whose honey this is. [thud] Well, it isn't mine. And I don't have time. It's harvest day! Says so in the book! I have carrots to cut, pumpkins to pick, peas to pluck! Well, of course it's mine. It's got my name scribbled all over it. T-I double g... Honey?! Yuck! P-tooie! BIech! Tiggers do not Iike honey. It isn't mine. Then again, few things are. [grunts and groans] Oh, here! If only I could find Christopher Robin. He could tell me whose it is. Why don't you check the note and find out? A note! Why, Rabbit, how clever of you. I'II just read it. Or would... if I could. Perhaps you can, Rabbit. [harrumphs] I could read this with my eyes closed. [chuckles] It says... [clears throat] [talks nonsense] Well, I could have read it if Tigger hadn't bounced me so. Tar? Jar? Oh, far! "Dear Pooh" it begins. "Worry about me." "I'm going far away." "Help!" And the note is signed "Crelm-flummin Bobbin." [chuckles] Oh, Christopher Robin. Christopher Robin? Gone far away? Oh, what a frightful thought. Wait! Why? When? Who authorized it? Where will we get the strength... to go on without him? [whimpers] [Pooh] Christopher Robin. My very best best friend. It simply cannot be. Whatever will I do? I wonder, Pooh, if... if perhaps u-u-until Christopher Robin gets back... um... I might possibly be your... best best friend. Yeah. [sobs] And when Piglet gets sick of you... [sobs] we can take over. Oh, thank you. But you already are the very best of my best friends. You see, you and I can do anything. But only Christopher Robin and I could do... nothing. Poor guy. His very Iittle brain is half gone with grief. Ah-ha! I've discovered where he went. [Iaughs] An O, another O, and... [gasps] Oh, my. What is it, Owl? Where is it? Somewhere bad, I fear. How bad? On a scale of one to ten... It's not good. [match strikes] [match strikes] He has gone to S-C-H-O-O-L. [gasps] Skull. Skull? What sort of place is that? Well, from the very sound of it, one can tell it's a most forbidding and faraway place. Then we must help Christopher Robin. Help him get back... to here. And us. And me. Then it's a quest, is it? [Iaughs] That's the spirit. Hoo, the nobility of it. A Iong and dangerous journey through the Great Unknown. Of course, you'II need a map. D-d-d-dangerous? Oh, Owl,... you wouldn't suppose we'd meet any, uh... Heffalumps? Oh, thank you, I nearly forgot. Herds of Heffalumps. [mutters] Down here I fancy, in the... southeast corner of the far west portion. W-w-what about W-w-woozles? Woozles! Wonderful! - Jagulars? - Hoo-hoo, just a dozen or three. Here, there and yonder. Not to mention the fabled... [chuckles] Skullasaurus. S-skulla...s-saurus? Oh, come, come, come. Without a monster or two it's hardly a quest. Merely a gaggle of friends wandering about. Hoo-hoo-hoo, how I envy you. Not everyone has the chance to face the unspeakable terrors of the Great Unknown. # Today's the day # In only a matter of moments You'll all be on your way # What lurks around the corner Not a soul can say # But I can guess # More or less # Hidden dangers, great duress # Ah, the moment of glory Is close at hand # Hoo-wee, it's gonna be grand # Adventure is a wonderful thing # Pack only the essentials I'll tell you what to bring # Your strength, your nerve Your hearts, your wits # And for skullasaurus attacks First-aid kits # Adventure is a hoot and a half # You'll face unearthly dangers And look at them and laugh # The claws, the teeth The chase, the thrill # You'll never want to come home Maybe you never will # That's the beauty of adventure It's strictly sink or float # It runs you till you're ragged Then it grabs you by the throat # You'll struggle to survive Although the chances are remote # Hoo-hoo, lucky you Wish I was coming too # Adventure is a wonderful thing I almost forgot the very best part. You not only save your friend from the most dangerous place, namely Skull, but from the most dangerous part of the most dangerous place. The eye of the skull itself. Oh, bother. # And you, General Pooh # Off you go Marching high and low # Your friend waits at the end # Right here # Take a look The map is perfectly clear # With your excellent sense of direction You've nothing to fear # Through the quicksand and the chasms # Tempting fate and fighting spasms # Dodging avalanching boulders # Remember # Christopher Robin's fate Rests completely on your shoulders, Pooh Excuse me. # It's up to you # That's the beauty of adventure # The trembling and the dread # I can't think of another thing I'd rather do instead Perhaps you could join us? # No, no, you go ahead # Hoo-hoo, lucky you Tally-ho and toodle-oo # Ready now? Noble chin Chest out, tummy in # Make a fracas, have a fling # Drop a postcard, give a ring # Get the lead out, time to swing # Whoop-de-doo and ba-da-bing # Adventure # Is a wonderful thing # I salute you. And those of you doomed to never return, I salute you twice. [narrator] And so Pooh and his friends crossed over into... well, that part of the Hundred Acre Wood which Owl called the "Great Unknown. " It was the start of their quest for Christopher Robin. They would find him, Owl said, if they could get through the woods. For the woods, Owl said, were filled with Heffalumps... and Woozles,... and... who knew how much worse? Look! "The Upside Down Rock." "If you've made it this far... you're where... monsters... are." [distant growling] What was that? Sounded too hungry for a Heffalump. [growling continues] Too plump for a Jagular. [growling continues] I'd say it's a... big old... buggy-eyed, saber-toothy skullasaurus. Skullasaurus? - Which way do we run? - Where do we hide? What's the shortest shortcut home? I believe... that way is a good way. [all] Run! [all gibber] AIthough, this way could be better. [Tigger] Give me a break! - If not over here. - [all scream] AIthough... [chuckles] there might be particularly pleasant as well. [all gibber] Stop it! We're getting nowhere fast, Pooh, and that just won't do. A Ieader must be someone Ieaderly, quick-thinking, informed. Someone Iike... - me. - [Iouder growling] Well,... there. Anyone with half a set of smarts can see we Iose the beast by cutting across this Iovely meadow. [squawking] And a Iovely meadow it is. [gasps] Why, Iook. Is that a golden dahlia-daffodilus? Rare for this Iocation. What exactly is this Iocation, Rabbit? And might it be nearer Christopher Robin than farther? Why, we're right here, on course, of course. Where else w-would we be? [squawking] Owl, where are we? "Nice peeceful spot!" Ha! Indeed! [ping] - [ping] - Oh, d-d-dear. This is not the place for a small and frightfully fearful animal... such as myself. Or myself. Or himself. Thanks for noticing. Yes, well, uh, precisely why I chose it. No skullasauruses would dare follow us in here. [chuckles] [distant growling] [screams] Piglet! Come back! I can't Iose you, too. [butterfly squeaks] [Piglet giggles] - [butterfly squeaks] - [Pooh] Oh, my, my. I believe you've made a friend, Piglet. [chuckles] I believe you're right, Pooh. [butterfly squeaks] [whistles] [butterflies squeak] And another, it seems. And also that one. And that one, too,... as well. And he, or her. And her, and him. And they, and them. Face it, Piglet, old pal, you're just plain popular. Some piglets have it,... some donkeys don't. [butterflies squeak] Why, I believe, Piglet, they want to take you home with them. [chuckles] It's very kind of them, I'm sure, but I already have a home. Oh, d-d-dear. Piglet. Don't Ieave. I wouldn't if I couldn't, but I can't. Jump, Piglet. We'II catch you, Iikely as not. I would if I could, but they won't Iet me. Perhaps you can ask your friends to bring you back. Why, yes. But I don't know which way back is. [chuckles] It's down here. Look. I'm afraid I'm too afraid to Iook. Oh, if only Christopher Robin was here. Christopher Robin. Piglet, that's it. He said all I have to do is remember that you are... bigger than a big Ieaf... I mean, uh, bolder when you're not green. [sighs] Or... Is any of this making you feel any Iess afraid, Piglet? I'm afraid not, Pooh. Oh, bother. Hm. How to get a piglet down who is very... up. [butterflies squeak] [Pooh] Oh, bother. E-excuse me, b-but is that you, Pooh? Yes, Piglet, it is. Might we be coming down soon? I believe so, Piglet. Uh, how soon? [Pooh] Very. [mutters] [shrieks] That's throwin' your weight around, Buddy Bear. Imagine, being outnumbered by those buggy boys a zillion to one. What a guy. Brave indeed. Now if you don't mind, Crustopher Ribbon, Ristopher Crobbin, Rustopher Crobbin, is this way. Are you all right, Piglet? Yes, Pooh. Thank you. Saving me was very brave of you. But you're brave, too, Piglet. Braver than... something. I am? Oh, what thing is that? I'm not sure, Piglet. Oh, if only I could remember. [narrator] This way and that way the map led them, to all the places Christopher Robin wasn't. But to none of the places he was. And still Rabbit refused to realize the map didn't know which way it was going. So we first head east by south, then south by east. Of course, minus the magnetic variation, plus the wind drift. We clearly go... this way! I wonder if those rather forbidding Iooking things might be the Forbidden Mountains, where Christopher Robin is. [Piglet] You're right, Pooh. [Tigger] You found 'em, Buddy Bear. Excuse me. The way to there is over here. But, Rabbit, isn't that them, over there? Now, which are you going to believe, this official map or your own eyes? Look for yourself and you'II see we're right on course. It's all right there in black and white. Why would anyone want to wander around wondering which way to go when they have a map to follow? # A map is not a guess An estimation or a hunch # A feeling or a foolish intuition # A map is a dependable, unwavering # Inarguably accurate portrayer # Of your position # Never trust your ears, your nose, your eyes # Putting faith in them is most unwise # Here's a phrase you all must memorize # "In the printed word is where truth lies " Y es, but, Rabbit... # Never trust your tummies, your tails or toes # You can't learn a thing from any of those # Here's another fact I must disclose # From the mighty pen true wisdom flows # If it says so # Then it is so # If it is so, well, so it is # A thought's not fit to think till it's printed in ink # Then it says so So it is Y es, but I think... # Never trust that thing between your ears # Brains will get you nowhere fast My dears # Haven't had a need for mine in years # On the page is where the truth appears # If it says so Then it is so # If it is so So it is # A thought's not fit to think Till it's printed in ink # Never differ from or doubt it - Bother. - # Or go anywhere without it # Thank goodness we've got this # So we don't need to fret about it # If it says so # So it is # [shrieks] Oh, no! The map! Get the map! With only half a map we're... we're Iess than nowhere. After that map! I got it! Don't have it. I had it! I don't have it now. I want it again. I got it! I ain't got it. I don't have it. I got it! Wait, I'II get it... No! I don't... I have it! Hmm. I wonder what's causing this tail to fail. Maybe it just doesn't have what it takes. [creaking] Yikes! Christopher Robin! Tigger, of all the safer places to be... I don't think this is one. - You could fall. - Yeah. Well, you know what they say. What doesn't bounce up has got to fall down. - [Iaughs] - [creaking] Uh... there's no time for this. We've had too many delays. So you just bounce out of there this moment. [Iaughs] No way. The wind isn't right. But there isn't any wind. OK, OK, you've got me. [sobs] The truth is... [whimpers] my tail... just doesn't have... enough strength. [sobs] Oh. [chuckles] Don't worry, Tigger, Christopher Robin said I just have to remember you're... taller than a beam. Really? Or was it "slower than whipped cream?" Do you feel any bouncier now? Nope. Oh... [chuckles] Perhaps your tail just needs a hand. Could you... bounce up this far? Pooh Bear! Ooh. How about now? No, no, no. Thanks for trying. I'm goin' out the way I came in. [sobs] A second-rate bouncer. [creaking] Piglet! [snorts, sobs] Um... Uh, Tigger. Hm? Oh... OK. Look at the biceps on that bear. I don't deserve to dangle from the same precipice. [creaking] [muffled] What's Donkey Boy saying? I said "Ouch." [all scream] [splash] Yike! Now, don't worry, Piglet, it's only me. Oh. Yike! Now, don't worry, Piglet, it's only Tigger and Rabbit and Eeyore. The map! Whoo-hoo, we have it! We can go now! [distant growling] Worry now, Piglet, it's the skullasaurus. I know we went over this way... And I came across... But then I... I Iost my way over... And if I don't... I know... Might you know which way Christopher Robin is from here, Rabbit? Uh, well... Uh, I mean the... There's this way, of course. Not that it's the right way. We obviously want to go this way. Though that way's further than farther and nearer than not. AIthough we can't rule out this way. Now, if Christopher Robin was here, what would he say? Well, he'd say... "That Rabbit can't function in this humidity." "It's not his fault. This fog isn't even on the map." "And that... [sobs] that Rabbit is just not smart enough to know where to go or... what to do." Oh. Christopher Robin says "At a time Iike this... all I have to do is remember..." Remember what? I forget. But it's something Iike... you're smarter when you're pink. Does that help? No. I don't know where we are and where we aren't. And I haven't known for hours. [sighs] I've failed us all. [footsteps] I believe I have as well. Let's face it, without Christopher Robin, we don't have a chance of finding Christopher Robin. Perhaps we might rest in there until this mist is mostly... mistless. [Eeyore] End o

Tagalog

Sa sandaling unang sa huling araw ng isang ginintuang tag-init, nagkaroon ng isang batang lalaki ... at bear. Ang batang lalaki na ating masasalubong sa isang sandali, ay tinawag Christopher Robin. Magsilang ng sanggol ay tinawag Winnie ang puwe. At sama-sama sila'y nagkaroon ng maraming enggrandeng pakikipagsapalaran sa isang kapansin-pansin na lugar na tinatawag na ang Hundred Acre Wood. Ngunit ang grandest at pinaka-hindi pangkaraniwang ng lahat ng kanilang mga pakikipagsapalaran ay pa rin para magsimula. T oday, tingin ko, ay isang magandang araw para sa pagiging puwe.

Last Update: 2017-02-15
Subject: General
Usage Frequency: 1
Quality:

Reference:
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English

tagalog yell para sa nutritions month wit lyrics

Tagalog

tagalog sumigaw para ay isang nutritions buwan wit lyrics

Last Update: 2016-12-17
Subject: General
Usage Frequency: 1
Quality:

Reference:

English

All it took was a solar eclipse and five-car collision atop the Magnetic Hill for the souls of five individuals --- the virginal bride-to-be (Angelica Panganiban), her histrionically litigious godmother (Eugene Domingo), her ringbearer's destitute nanny (Tuesday Vargas), her husband-to-be's amorous grandfather (Jaime Fabregas), and her gay beautician (John Lapuz) --- to switch bodies. With the bride-to-be's soul transferring to the godmother's body; the godmother's soul transferring to the nanny's body; the nanny's soul transferring to the grandfather's body; the grandfather's soul transferring to the beautician's body; and the beautician's soul transferring to the bride-to-be's body, the dream beach wedding turns into a hilarious riot, where long-dormant passions are awakened, sexual fantasies are fulfilled, economic alleviation is achieved, and a chance at love is obtained. Let us get it out of the way. Chris Martinez's Here Comes the Bride is top-notch entertainment. Martinez was able to come up with everything most recent Filipino mainstream comedies lack: that no-nonsense singular objective of making people laugh. From the getgo to the post-credit extra scene, the film never stopped to be overtly pedantic or moralistic, a problem that most Filipino comedies have since there always seems to be this need to use cinema as replacement for Sunday school. For example, Wenn Deramas' Ang Tanging Ina (The True Mother, 2003), and its sequel and many offshoots, are always derailed by its insistence on teaching a lesson; even Joyce Bernal's Kimmy Dora (2009) is stalled by its apologetic dénouement that went too long and too serious. Never mind the forced logic to explain the illogic, the negligible business about solar eclipses and souls, the history and science behind the soul-swap, as authoritatively explained by television trivia-master Kim Atienza. Here Comes the Bride is deliriously funny nonsense all the way and it thankfully works. The film's success is not entirely surprising. After all, Martinez is arguably one of the Philippines' better screenwriters. His screenplays, from Bridal Shower (Jeffrey Jeturian, 2004), about three friends in search of love, to Caregiver (Chito Roño, 2008), about a mother who follows her husband to London in the hopes of earning enough to live comfortably, reflect his ability to articulate something as minute as the language to something as pertinent as the needs of the rapidly-changing Filipino society for mainstream appeal. 100 (2008), his directorial debut about a woman who is dying from cancer, is salvaged from being a run-of-the-mill melodrama by an abundance of relevant humor. Martinez understands the Filipino soul, that the very best way to tackle something as devastating as death is to treat it with levity, to make it familiar and therefore personal. That said, Martinez may very well be the most current of all actively working screenwriters, actively pursuing entertainment without being dumbed down by the demands of commercial accessibility. Despite its astounding technical polish, Here Comes the Bride is fundamentally closer to Joey Gosiengfiao's redeemed Temptation Island (1981), where a bunch of beauty queens and the men surrounding them are stranded in a deserted island, than the mechanically churned comedies Star Cinema has been producing the past recent years. Underneath the caricatures that Martinez connected by the conceit of the convenient soul-swap, underneath the blatant inanity of its carefully conceived proceedings, is a well-pronounced understanding that life, as it is, is unfair, that there are those who are born poor, those who live loveless, and those who inevitably grow old and inutile. In a twist of fate, cruel only to the bride-to-be who suddenly gets a first-hand experience of the inequity of living after a lifetime of being sheltered and protected, inabilities and deficiencies are cured, emphasizing in what essentially is a film created for no other reason than to be an escapist fantasy that the key to a happy life is as unrealistic and as incredible as swapping souls via rare natural phenomena. Like Temptation Island whose gay pageant director becomes the unwilling sacrificial lamb simply because he presumably has the least to lose among the other loved and loving survivors, the most fully realized character in Here Comes the Bride is the love-starved gay beautician whose fortune of being transported to the body of the beautiful and sexy bride-to-be is the most dramatic out of the five. As expected, it is mostly played for laughs and Panganiban does a brilliant job in emulating the fabulous larger-than-life gestures of Lapuz. After all, the very idea of a gay man suddenly and surprisingly getting everything he ever wanted, from the body parts he can only have in his wildest dreams to the straight men who he can only love and lust for from a safe distance, is in itself a hoot. The hilarity of the absurd situation, at that scene where the bride-to-be in the body of her godmother insists that the gay beautician return her body, unravels into a well-pronounced statement of gay angst and sentiment as he emotionally shouts "Hindi ninyo maiintindihan dahil hindi kayo bakla! (You will never understand because you are not gay!). At that moment, the film, notwithstanding the fact that it never stopped being funny, reflected a current fundamental truth, something that not even a mainstream film as self-promotedly queer as Olivia Lamasan's In My Life (2009) can have the guts to state as plainly and matter-of-factly as that. The gay man becomes a girl. The loveless godmother feels how it is to be loved. The amorous yet incapacitated grandfather relives the passion and the romance of his distant youth. The poor nanny turns into a millionaire. The innocent bride-to-be wallows in the realities of life's misfortune. Martinez fills the screen with realized desires at the expense of the bride-to-be, emphasizing the frailty of the human soul in the face of happiness. In the midst of the film's invaluable wit and humor that frequently pumps in rhythm with the Latin beats of the apt lively music score, the film's characters, ideally uncomplicated and stereotypical, are allowed to live their desires realized, concretizing in easy-to-understand cinematic terms the pleasures of escape, of living a fantasy even if it is only momentarily. I am very happy to say that Here Comes the Bride is as current and relevant as it is entertaining and hysterical.

Tagalog

All it took was a solar eclipse and five-car collision atop the Magnetic Hill for the souls of five individuals --- the virginal bride-to-be (Angelica Panganiban), her histrionically litigious godmother (Eugene Domingo), her ringbearer's destitute nanny (Tuesday Vargas), her husband-to-be's amorous grandfather (Jaime Fabregas), and her gay beautician (John Lapuz) --- to switch bodies. With the bride-to-be's soul transferring to the godmother's body; the godmother's soul transferring to the nanny's body; the nanny's soul transferring to the grandfather's body; the grandfather's soul transferring to the beautician's body; and the beautician's soul transferring to the bride-to-be's body, the dream beach wedding turns into a hilarious riot, where long-dormant passions are awakened, sexual fantasies are fulfilled, economic alleviation is achieved, and a chance at love is obtained. Let us get it out of the way. Chris Martinez's Here Comes the Bride is top-notch entertainment. Martinez was able to come up with everything most recent Filipino mainstream comedies lack: that no-nonsense singular objective of making people laugh. From the getgo to the post-credit extra scene, the film never stopped to be overtly pedantic or moralistic, a problem that most Filipino comedies have since there always seems to be this need to use cinema as replacement for Sunday school. For example, Wenn Deramas' Ang Tanging Ina (The True Mother, 2003), and its sequel and many offshoots, are always derailed by its insistence on teaching a lesson; even Joyce Bernal's Kimmy Dora (2009) is stalled by its apologetic dénouement that went too long and too serious. Never mind the forced logic to explain the illogic, the negligible business about solar eclipses and souls, the history and science behind the soul-swap, as authoritatively explained by television trivia-master Kim Atienza. Here Comes the Bride is deliriously funny nonsense all the way and it thankfully works. The film's success is not entirely surprising. After all, Martinez is arguably one of the Philippines' better screenwriters. His screenplays, from Bridal Shower (Jeffrey Jeturian, 2004), about three friends in search of love, to Caregiver (Chito Roño, 2008), about a mother who follows her husband to London in the hopes of earning enough to live comfortably, reflect his ability to articulate something as minute as the language to something as pertinent as the needs of the rapidly-changing Filipino society for mainstream appeal. 100 (2008), his directorial debut about a woman who is dying from cancer, is salvaged from being a run-of-the-mill melodrama by an abundance of relevant humor. Martinez understands the Filipino soul, that the very best way to tackle something as devastating as death is to treat it with levity, to make it familiar and therefore personal. That said, Martinez may very well be the most current of all actively working screenwriters, actively pursuing entertainment without being dumbed down by the demands of commercial accessibility. Despite its astounding technical polish, Here Comes the Bride is fundamentally closer to Joey Gosiengfiao's redeemed Temptation Island (1981), where a bunch of beauty queens and the men surrounding them are stranded in a deserted island, than the mechanically churned comedies Star Cinema has been producing the past recent years. Underneath the caricatures that Martinez connected by the conceit of the convenient soul-swap, underneath the blatant inanity of its carefully conceived proceedings, is a well-pronounced understanding that life, as it is, is unfair, that there are those who are born poor, those who live loveless, and those who inevitably grow old and inutile. In a twist of fate, cruel only to the bride-to-be who suddenly gets a first-hand experience of the inequity of living after a lifetime of being sheltered and protected, inabilities and deficiencies are cured, emphasizing in what essentially is a film created for no other reason than to be an escapist fantasy that the key to a happy life is as unrealistic and as incredible as swapping souls via rare natural phenomena. Like Temptation Island whose gay pageant director becomes the unwilling sacrificial lamb simply because he presumably has the least to lose among the other loved and loving survivors, the most fully realized character in Here Comes the Bride is the love-starved gay beautician whose fortune of being transported to the body of the beautiful and sexy bride-to-be is the most dramatic out of the five. As expected, it is mostly played for laughs and Panganiban does a brilliant job in emulating the fabulous larger-than-life gestures of Lapuz. After all, the very idea of a gay man suddenly and surprisingly getting everything he ever wanted, from the body parts he can only have in his wildest dreams to the straight men who he can only love and lust for from a safe distance, is in itself a hoot. The hilarity of the absurd situation, at that scene where the bride-to-be in the body of her godmother insists that the gay beautician return her body, unravels into a well-pronounced statement of gay angst and sentiment as he emotionally shouts "Hindi ninyo maiintindihan dahil hindi kayo bakla! (You will never understand because you are not gay!). At that moment, the film, notwithstanding the fact that it never stopped being funny, reflected a current fundamental truth, something that not even a mainstream film as self-promotedly queer as Olivia Lamasan's In My Life (2009) can have the guts to state as plainly and matter-of-factly as that. The gay man becomes a girl. The loveless godmother feels how it is to be loved. The amorous yet incapacitated grandfather relives the passion and the romance of his distant youth. The poor nanny turns into a millionaire. The innocent bride-to-be wallows in the realities of life's misfortune. Martinez fills the screen with realized desires at the expense of the bride-to-be, emphasizing the frailty of the human soul in the face of happiness. In the midst of the film's invaluable wit and humor that frequently pumps in rhythm with the Latin beats of the apt lively music score, the film's characters, ideally uncomplicated and stereotypical, are allowed to live their desires realized, concretizing in easy-to-understand cinematic terms the pleasures of escape, of living a fantasy even if it is only momentarily. I am very happy to say that Here Comes the Bride is as current and relevant as it is entertaining and hysterical. All it took was a solar eclipse and five-car collision atop the Magnetic Hill for the souls of five individuals --- the virginal bride-to-be (Angelica Panganiban), her histrionically litigious godmother (Eugene Domingo), her ringbearer's destitute nanny (Tuesday Vargas), her husband-to-be's amorous grandfather (Jaime Fabregas), and her gay beautician (John Lapuz) --- to switch bodies. With the bride-to-be's soul transferring to the godmother's body; the godmother's soul transferring to the nanny's body; the nanny's soul transferring to the grandfather's body; the grandfather's soul transferring to the beautician's body; and the beautician's soul transferring to the bride-to-be's body, the dream beach wedding turns into a hilarious riot, where long-dormant passions are awakened, sexual fantasies are fulfilled, economic alleviation is achieved, and a chance at love is obtained. Let us get it out of the way. Chris Martinez's Here Comes the Bride is top-notch entertainment. Martinez was able to come up with everything most recent Filipino mainstream comedies lack: that no-nonsense singular objective of making people laugh. From the getgo to the post-credit extra scene, the film never stopped to be overtly pedantic or moralistic, a problem that most Filipino comedies have since there always seems to be this need to use cinema as replacement for Sunday school. For example, Wenn Deramas' Ang Tanging Ina (The True Mother, 2003), and its sequel and many offshoots, are always derailed by its insistence on teaching a lesson; even Joyce Bernal's Kimmy Dora (2009) is stalled by its apologetic dénouement that went too long and too serious. Never mind the forced logic to explain the illogic, the negligible business about solar eclipses and souls, the history and science behind the soul-swap, as authoritatively explained by television trivia-master Kim Atienza. Here Comes the Bride is deliriously funny nonsense all the way and it thankfully works. The film's success is not entirely surprising. After all, Martinez is arguably one of the Philippines' better screenwriters. His screenplays, from Bridal Shower (Jeffrey Jeturian, 2004), about three friends in search of love, to Caregiver (Chito Roño, 2008), about a mother who follows her husband to London in the hopes of earning enough to live comfortably, reflect his ability to articulate something as minute as the language to something as pertinent as the needs of the rapidly-changing Filipino society for mainstream appeal. 100 (2008), his directorial debut about a woman who is dying from cancer, is salvaged from being a run-of-the-mill melodrama by an abundance of relevant humor. Martinez understands the Filipino soul, that the very best way to tackle something as devastating as death is to treat it with levity, to make it familiar and therefore personal. That said, Martinez may very well be the most current of all actively working screenwriters, actively pursuing entertainment without being dumbed down by the demands of commercial accessibility. Despite its astounding technical polish, Here Comes the Bride is fundamentally closer to Joey Gosiengfiao's redeemed Temptation Island (1981), where a bunch of beauty queens and the men surrounding them are stranded in a deserted island, than the mechanically churned comedies Star Cinema has been producing the past recent years. Underneath the caricatures that Martinez connected by the conceit of the convenient soul-swap, underneath the blatant inanity of its carefully conceived proceedings, is a well-pronounced understanding that life, as it is, is unfair, that there are those who are born poor, those who live loveless, and those who inevitably grow old and inutile. In a twist of fate, cruel only to the bride-to-be who suddenly gets a first-hand experience of the inequity of living after a lifetime of being sheltered and protected, inabilities and deficiencies are cured, emphasizing in what essentially is a film created for no other reason than to be an escapist fantasy that the key to a happy life is as unrealistic and as incredible as swapping souls via rare natural phenomena. Like Temptation Island whose gay pageant director becomes the unwilling sacrificial lamb simply because he presumably has the least to lose among the other loved and loving survivors, the most fully realized character in Here Comes the Bride is the love-starved gay beautician whose fortune of being transported to the body of the beautiful and sexy bride-to-be is the most dramatic out of the five. As expected, it is mostly played for laughs and Panganiban does a brilliant job in emulating the fabulous larger-than-life gestures of Lapuz. After all, the very idea of a gay man suddenly and surprisingly getting everything he ever wanted, from the body parts he can only have in his wildest dreams to the straight men who he can only love and lust for from a safe distance, is in itself a hoot. The hilarity of the absurd situation, at that scene where the bride-to-be in the body of her godmother insists that the gay beautician return her body, unravels into a well-pronounced statement of gay angst and sentiment as he emotionally shouts "Hindi ninyo maiintindihan dahil hindi kayo bakla! (You will never understand because you are not gay!). At that moment, the film, notwithstanding the fact that it never stopped being funny, reflected a current fundamental truth, something that not even a mainstream film as self-promotedly queer as Olivia Lamasan's In My Life (2009) can have the guts to state as plainly and matter-of-factly as that. The gay man becomes a girl. The loveless godmother feels how it is to be loved. The amorous yet incapacitated grandfather relives the passion and the romance of his distant youth. The poor nanny turns into a millionaire. The innocent bride-to-be wallows in the realities of life's misfortune. Martinez fills the screen with realized desires at the expense of the bride-to-be, emphasizing the frailty of the human soul in the face of happiness. In the midst of the film's invaluable wit and humor that frequently pumps in rhythm with the Latin beats of the apt lively music score, the film's characters, ideally uncomplicated and stereotypical, are allowed to live their desires realized, concretizing in easy-to-understand cinematic terms the pleasures of escape, of living a fantasy even if it is only momentarily. I am very happy to say that Here Comes the Bride is as current and relevant as it is entertaining and hysterical.

Last Update: 2016-12-05
Subject: General
Usage Frequency: 1
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English

She was one of those pretty and charming girls born, as though fate had blundered over her, into a family of artisans. She had no marriage portion, no expectations, no means of getting known, understood, loved, and wedded by a man of wealth and distinction; and she let herself be married off to a little clerk in the Ministry of Education. Her tastes were simple because she had never been able to afford any other, but she was as unhappy as though she had married beneath her; for women have no caste or class, their beauty, grace, and charm serving them for birth or family, their natural delicacy, their instinctive elegance, their nimbleness of wit, are their only mark of rank, and put the slum girl on a level with the highest lady in the land.

Tagalog

the-kuwintas story

Last Update: 2016-11-21
Subject: Accounting
Usage Frequency: 1
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English

The policeman on the beat moved up the avenue impressively. The impressiveness was habitual and not for show, for spectators were few. The time was barely 10 o'clock at night, but chilly gusts of wind with a taste of rain in them had well nigh depeopled the streets. Trying doors as he went, twirling his club with many intricate and artful movements, turning now and then to cast his watchful eye adown the pacific thoroughfare, the officer, with his stalwart form and slight swagger, made a fine picture of a guardian of the peace. The vicinity was one that kept early hours. Now and then you might see the lights of a cigar store or of an all-night lunch counter; but the majority of the doors belonged to business places that had long since been closed. When about midway of a certain block the policeman suddenly slowed his walk. In the doorway of a darkened hardware store a man leaned, with an unlighted cigar in his mouth. As the policeman walked up to him the man spoke up quickly. "It's all right, officer," he said, reassuringly. "I'm just waiting for a friend. It's an appointment made twenty years ago. Sounds a little funny to you, doesn't it? Well, I'll explain if you'd like to make certain it's all straight. About that long ago there used to be a restaurant where this store stands--'Big Joe' Brady's restaurant." "Until five years ago," said the policeman. "It was torn down then." The man in the doorway struck a match and lit his cigar. The light showed a pale, square-jawed face with keen eyes, and a little white scar near his right eyebrow. His scarfpin was a large diamond, oddly set. "Twenty years ago to-night," said the man, "I dined here at 'Big Joe' Brady's with Jimmy Wells, my best chum, and the finest chap in the world. He and I were raised here in New York, just like two brothers, together. I was eighteen and Jimmy was twenty. The next morning I was to start for the West to make my fortune. You couldn't have dragged Jimmy out of New York; he thought it was the only place on earth. Well, we agreed that night that we would meet here again exactly twenty years from that date and time, no matter what our conditions might be or from what distance we might have to come. We figured that in twenty years each of us ought to have our destiny worked out and our fortunes made, whatever they were going to be." "It sounds pretty interesting," said the policeman. "Rather a long time between meets, though, it seems to me. Haven't you heard from your friend since you left?" "Well, yes, for a time we corresponded," said the other. "But after a year or two we lost track of each other. You see, the West is a pretty big proposition, and I kept hustling around over it pretty lively. But I know Jimmy will meet me here if he's alive, for he always was the truest, stanchest old chap in the world. He'll never forget. I came a thousand miles to stand in this door to-night, and it's worth it if my old partner turns up." The waiting man pulled out a handsome watch, the lids of it set with small diamonds. "Three minutes to ten," he announced. "It was exactly ten o'clock when we parted here at the restaurant door."__ "Did pretty well out West, didn't you?" asked the policeman. "You bet! I hope Jimmy has done half as well. He was a kind of plodder, though, good fellow as he was. I've had to compete with some of the sharpest wits going to get my pile. A man gets in a groove in New York. It takes the West to put a razor-edge on him." The policeman twirled his club and took a step or two. "I'll be on my way. Hope your friend comes around all right. Going to call time on him sharp?" "I should say not!" said the other. "I'll give him half an hour at least. If Jimmy is alive on earth he'll be here by that time. So long, officer." "Good-night, sir," said the policeman, passing on along his beat, trying doors as he went. There was now a fine, cold drizzle falling, and the wind had risen from its uncertain puffs into a steady blow. The few foot passengers astir in that quarter hurried dismally and silently along with coat collars turned high and pocketed hands. And in the door of the hardware store the man who had come a thousand miles to fill an appointment, uncertain almost to absurdity, with the friend of his youth, smoked his cigar and waited. About twenty minutes he waited, and then a tall man in a long overcoat, with collar turned up to his ears, hurried across from the opposite side of the street. He went directly to the waiting man. "Is that you, Bob?" he asked, doubtfully. "Is that you, Jimmy Wells?" cried the man in the door. "Bless my heart!" exclaimed the new arrival, grasping both the other's hands with his own. "It's Bob, sure as fate. I was certain I'd find you here if you were still in existence. Well, well, well! --twenty years is a long time. The old gone, Bob; I wish it had lasted, so we could have had another dinner there. How has the West treated you, old man?" "Bully; it has given me everything I asked it for. You've changed lots, Jimmy. I never thought you were so tall by two or three inches." "Oh, I grew a bit after I was twenty." "Doing well in New York, Jimmy?" "Moderately. I have a position in one of the city departments. Come on, Bob; we'll go around to a place I know of, and have a good long talk about old times." The two men started up the street, arm in arm. The man from the West, his egotism enlarged by success, was beginning to outline the history of his career. The other, submerged in his overcoat, listened with interest. At the corner stood a drug store, brilliant with electric lights. When they came into this glare each of them turned simultaneously to gaze upon the other's face. The man from the West stopped suddenly and released his arm. "You're not Jimmy Wells," he snapped. "Twenty years is a long time, but not long enough to change a man's nose from a Roman to a pug." "It sometimes changes a good man into a bad one, said the tall man. "You've been under arrest for ten minutes, 'Silky' Bob. Chicago thinks you may have dropped over our way and wires us she wants to have a chat with you. Going quietly, are you? That's sensible. Now, before we go on to the station here's a note I was asked to hand you. You may read it here at the window. It's from Patrolman Wells." The man from the West unfolded the little piece of paper handed him. His hand was steady when he began to read, but it trembled a little by the time he had finished. The note was rather short. ~"Bob: I was at the appointed place on time. When you struck the match to light your cigar I saw it was the face of the man wanted in Chicago. Somehow I couldn't do it myself, so I went around and got a plain clothes man to do the job.

Tagalog

okupasyon

Last Update: 2015-09-13
Subject: General
Usage Frequency: 1
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English

KNOW ALL MEN BY THESE PRESENTS: I, ____name of testator_____ , Filipino citizen, of legal age, single/married to ___insert name of spouse if any___, born on the ____th of ______________, ____ , a resident of __insert address__ , being of sound and disposing mind and memory, and not acting under undue influence or intimidation from anyone, do hereby declare and proclaim this instrument to be my Last Will and Testament, in English, the language which I am well conversant. And I hereby declare that: I. I desire that should I die, it is my wish to be buried according to the rites of the Roman Catholic Church and interred at our family mausoleum in Manila; II. To my beloved wife _____name of wife_____, I give and bequeath the following property to wit:_________________________ ; III. To my esteemed children, ________________________ and ______________________I give and bequeath the following properties to wit:_______________________________ in equal shares; IV. To my dear brother, __________________________I give and bequeath the following properties to wit:_______________________________. V. To my loyal assistant, __________________________I give and bequeath the following properties to wit:_______________________________. VI. I hereby designate ____name of executor_____ the executor and administrator of this Last Will and Testament, and in his incapacity, I name and designate _____________________ as his substitute. VII. I hereby direct that the executor and administrator of this Last Will and Testament or his substitute need not present any bond; VIII. I hereby revoke, set aside and annul any and all of my other will or testamentary dispositions that I have made, executed, signed or published preceding this Last Will and Testament. IN WITNESS WHEREOF, I have hereunto affixed my signature this ________ day of _____________, 20__, in ________________, Philippines. _______________________________________ (Signature of Testator over Printed Name) ATTESTATION CLAUSE We, the undersigned attesting witnesses, do hereby affirm that the forgoing is the last Will and Testament of ___name of testator___ and we certify that the testator executed this document while of sound mind and memory. That the testator signed this document in our presence, at the bottom of the last page and on the left hand margin of each and every page, and we, in turn, at the testator's behest have witnessed and signed the same in every page thereof, on the left margin, in the presence of the testator and of the notary public, this _____ day of __________, 20__ at____________. ______________________________ ____________________________________________ Signature of Witness Address ______________________________ ____________________________________________ Signature of Witness Address ______________________________ ____________________________________________ Signature of Witness Address JOINT ACKNOWLEDGMENT BEFORE ME, Notary Public for and in the city of ________________, personally appeared: The testator ________________, with CTC No. __________ issued at ___________ on ____________; Witness, ___________________, with CTC No. __________ issued at ___________ on ____________; Witness, ___________________, with CTC No. __________ issued at ___________ on ____________; Witness, ___________________, with CTC No. __________ issued at ___________ on ____________; all known to me to be the same persons who executed the foregoing Will, the first as testator and the last three as instrumental witnesses, and they respectively acknowledged to me that the same as their own free act and deed. This Last Will and Testament consists of __ page/s, including the page on which this acknowledgment is written, and has been signed on the left margin of each and every page thereof by the testator and his witnesses, and sealed with my notarial seal. IN WITNESS WHEREOF, I have hereunto set my hand the day, year, and place above written. Notary Public Doc. No. _____; Page No._____; Book No._____; Series of 20__.

Tagalog

last will and testament

Last Update: 2015-07-23
Subject: General
Usage Frequency: 1
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English

Why is the Camel's Neck Crooked? As you all know, Emperor Akbar was very impressed with Birbal's wisdom and greatly enjoyed his quick wit. One fine morning when Akbar was especially pleased with Birbal, as a gesture of appreciation, he promised to reward him with many valuable and beautiful gifts. However, many days passed, and still there was no sign of even one gift. Birbal was quite disappointed with the king. Then one day, when Akbar was strolling down the banks of River Yamuna with his ever faithful Birbal at his side, he happened to notice a camel passing by. He asked Birbal why the neck of the camel was crooked. Birbal thought for a second and promptly replied that it might be because the camel may have forgotten to honour a promise. The holy books mention that those who break their word get punished with a crooked neck; perhaps that was the reason for the camel's crooked neck. Akbar soon realised his folly of making a promise to Birbal for gifts and not honouring it. He was ashamed of himself. As soon as they returned to the palace he immediately gave Birbal his justly deserved reward. As you can see, Birbal always managed to get what he wanted without directly asking for it.

Tagalog

talambuhay ni Jesse Robredo tagalog

Last Update: 2015-07-18
Subject: General
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English

Akin anak tita wits

Tagalog

La manswem t agpabaknang brad...umuna kau lattan

Last Update: 2014-10-09
Usage Frequency: 1
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