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Not by your old name I address you, no, not by the one you went by when living in the midst, Mamang, name that kept you bound to cradle, washtub, sink stove and still your back bent and all your singing caked into silence, your dreaming crushed like fishbones in the traffic of daily need. Your own name, then. Amina. Cold letters etched on stone in Ormoc's graveyard hill, the syllables gliding still all music and glod upon the tongue of memory. Amina. Back here, no news you'd like to hear, or that you wouldn't know: One day at noon, in a year of war and famine, of volcanoes bursting and earthquakes shaking the ground we stood on, floodwaters broke the mountains. Our city drowned in an hour's rampage. But you've gone ahead to this hill earlier, three years, you weren't there to witness what we had to do among the leavings of the water, mud, rubble, debris, countless bodies littering the streets-- your husband among them, a son, his wife, their children--how in a panic, we pried and scraped and shoveled from the ooze what had once been beloved, crammed them coffinless without ritual without tears into the maw of earth beside you up on that hill. Amina, what have the angels to say of that gross outrage? You must know I keep my own name, times, I feel myself free to chosse the words of my singing, though in my own woman's voice, cracked with too much laughter, or anger, or tears, who's to listen, I don't know, admitting as I do no traffics with angels. I htink of your beauty fading and this, what's left for a daughter to touch-- your namestone mute among the grass greensinging, your name i raise to the wind like a prayer. If you hear it among the lift and fall of angel wings, oh please send word somehow. Please let me know, have they given you back your voice?Safe among the angels, what can a woman sing?
sulat sa amina, na dapat tiyak na maging kabilang anghel
Last Update: 2017-06-28
Usage Frequency: 1